cule-for-life:

Little humans are so tiring. I don’t know how people do this long term. I haven’t been here 12 hours and I’m ready for nap time.

You just gotta lean into it and realize “this is my life now.”

Tags: parenting

He thinks he won that game for real, but subconsciously he knows the truth.

Parenting is a hostage situation

Possibly more awkward than the Birds and the Bees Talk

improvisingfatherhood:

With the boys in bed, Ashley and I fired up our next episode of The Walking Dead when suddenly we hear a noise from upstairs. What followed was a conversation that might be more awkward than a sex talk.

I went to Chandler’s door. 

Chandler: Dad, what was that sound? I heard it.

Me: That….well…that was the TV.

Chandler: Why? 

Me: Well buddy…because…Mommy and I are watching…a TV show.

Chandler: Why?

Me: ….Okay, it’s time for you to get back in bed.

I should have said, “Well son, when a Mommy and Daddy love a TV show very much, they can’t wait to put their kids to sleep so they can watch as many episodes as possible.”

Good Environment Work

improvisingfatherhood:

Remember when I used to write about the connection between parenting and improv?

I realized today that Chandler is better at pantomime than most of the improvisers that I perform with. No offense to any fellow improvisers that might be reading this, but it’s true.

Today Chandler and I were playing and he needed some tools to fix his robot. In an improv scene the improviser would probably have pulled those tools out of thin air. It’s one of my biggest pet peeves about improv; improvisers don’t always take the time to do good pantomime or build their environment. So a set of tools might just happen to be floating right next to the improviser, or maybe they were in his hand all along even though they weren’t.

But not with Chandler. As I watched him turn around, pick the spot where he decided they were stored, and then carefully pick out each tool, I couldn’t help but laugh. The kid’s a natural! Granted, once the tools were in his hand, his object work was a little sloppy. But he does a great job creating his environment and knowing that every imagined object has to come from somewhere.

I think he does a better job than most improvisers because unlike an improviser, when he’s acting out a scene he’s not worried about getting a laugh. Improvisers often start to panic if the laughs aren’t constantly flowing, and that causes them to rush through actions that they don’t think will directly get laughs. Chandler, on the other hand, is just playing. He’s acting out very specific and elaborate scenes and taking his time not to miss a single detail.

I might be able to make some money on the side by holding an improv workshop where people just watch us play Ninja Turtles.

Parenting is hard.

(Source: awkward-elevator)

thedaddycomplex:

GPOY: Writing my presentation for the Dad 2.0 Summit

thedaddycomplex:

GPOY: Writing my presentation for the Dad 2.0 Summit

(Source: thesmoothcriminal)

thedaddycomplex:

notthatjesus:

How I’ll raise my future child.

How I’m raising my present children.

How I’m raising my neighbor’s children.

thedaddycomplex:

notthatjesus:

How I’ll raise my future child.

How I’m raising my present children.

How I’m raising my neighbor’s children.

How I Stop Our Boys’ Unnecessary Tears

thedaddycomplex:

That question from earlier made me think of this.

If one of our boys comes to me on the verge of tears and says, “I bonked my elbow!” I check out the injury and say something like, “Well, it seems okay, so… oh, wait a minute. Okay, I see. Yeah, this is going to have to come off.” Then, I pretend to try and pull their arm off.

I put a lot of effort into it, grunting and gritting my teeth, sometimes dangling them upside down. Then, I look for the “release switch,” which invariably resides under the armpit. When they’re squealing with laughter, I stop and say, “Well, I can’t get it to come off. Think you’ll be okay?” They always say yes.

I have yet to try this tactic on a serious injury.

thedaddycomplex:

I’m thinking of jumping on the “Elf on the Shelf” bandwagon, but maybe upping the game a bit. This one should keep the boys in line.
(Source: Susan’s Custom Creepy Dolls)

Oh my God, David.

thedaddycomplex:

I’m thinking of jumping on the “Elf on the Shelf” bandwagon, but maybe upping the game a bit. This one should keep the boys in line.

(Source: Susan’s Custom Creepy Dolls)

Oh my God, David.

The Frogman asked me for some advice on cool gifts for newborn babies. Baby toys can be expensive but you can create some pretty great gifts from normal items around your house. You’re welcome.

thedaddycomplex:

Farting. Baby. Puppet.

Tags: parenting

The Worst Bad Guys Ever

  • Wyatt: Let's pretend we're bad guys, but we do nice things for people in a nice way.
  • Me: That sounds like we'd be good guys, then.
  • Wyatt: But, we're bad guys.
  • Me: So, we're bad bad guys?
  • Wyatt: Yeah.